Wednesday, 21 June 2017

Sings for itself

M I D - W E E K    B L U E S 

I've shared this song on here before, months & months ago.
The most painfully honest and unapologetic words I've heard.

Teaching yourself to not give a shit has consequences my friends.
I find it extremely difficult to put how i feel into words, something i feel like i used to be good at or at least less incompetent than i am now. I mean, yes I've learnt to hold back things that aren't worth the fight or I've learnt to be less petty (note: Less petty, I'm human so i can't get rid of it) but now when i need to articulate any kind of melancholic emotion i struggle so much and other people suffer the consequences too. I become a walking contradiction most of the time because I'm afraid to be as brutally honest & unapologetic as Banks is in this song.

Incidentally, I officially start my internship during the first week of Raya so I'm at a lost with distractions. I become almost bitter if I spend the entire day at home although I love spending time with my family, babysitting Musa can be tiring and i get really bored perched on the sofa all day. Every other night, I make it a point to go out and see any one of my friends after buka to keep myself sane. They don't know it, but all of them play a big part at keeping this one happy when she feels like she's in turmoil.

On a brighter note, i really hope all of my fellow Muslims had a good Ramadhan and made the best out of this holy month.It went by super fast, i can barely recall the last couple weeks. I mean, aside from all the horrible things that have been happening all over the world tainted with the bad image of Islam and smeared with the blood of so many innocents. Odd that Ramadhan is supposed to be the month when Syaiton (the devil) himself is bound from causing harm. Makes you think, doesn't it? He was immensely successful at contaminating the hearts of so many in order to do his dirty work, scarring so many & have us doubt in humanity. Sigh, so much for a brighter note. I guess there hasn't been much light in my days but i digress,

if you're in a wallow like me i hope you can learn to let yourself be happy even we're you're not xx

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