Wednesday, 1 March 2017

Legally blegh

// future (usually near); prospects //

I'm not gonna apologize for the little hiatus since my last post because there's no words to express the limbo of thoughts that I've been a captive of. 
I was really looking forward to write up for my 21st birthday but when the time came, I felt a little less hopeful and that came with no real inspiration or passion to write. I almost always ever write only when i feel like it; I never liked this being an action forced upon me following any sort of deadline even thought i used to write at least once a week. 

Speaking of my 21st birthday, it was a really bittersweet one. Many of the people that mean a lot to me weren't around so i really didn't feel like celebrating neither did i expect anything because i was at uni. To my surprise, Adrin and Asel had planned something small (but meant a lot) for me the midnight of my birthday. I was studying up until midnight, and around half hour into my birthday was when my Notty gang surprised me. Makes me feel so warm and fuzzy inside when i think about it *happy sighs*. 
Side note: Have you ever met people that you wish you would've met a lot sooner in your life because you guys are on the same wavelength? That's how i feel about Asel. I'm pretty sad that it's her last year here at Notts but I really appreciate the friendship we have now. That girl doesn't have a bad bone in her body.
The weekend that followed included a spa day and fatty crab, yumz.

Back to present day, I'm feeling out of sorts and I'm just now realizing how often i feel this way the older (not so much wiser) that i get. Looking through playlists that i used to make during this times of - for the lack of a better word - despair. Listening to them obviously makes me sad like when people watch Bridget Jones after a break up but hopeful...

Told you, limbo. It's sort of like I'm reminded that i have felt this way before but i did overcome it, hence i will be able to overcome it once again (hopefully soon).

Here's a short photo diary of miscellaneous things that happened since the last post;

Sha's farewell ):

MIA: Asel & Adrin. And look Mel was there too! Hahah
Kisses for his one & only caci.

Musa boy 
My beautiful cousins; February babies

Asel & Adrin.

It's small hurdle to overcome but I'll be sure to sprint once i see that finish line.
(wow cheeseballs)


  1. Hey Marissa! Do you think its weird or bad that I don't have a bf yet even at the age of 20? I've nvr been a relationship before, like ever. And I used to be completely fine with that just because having a bf didn't really appeal to me few years back. But lately I just feel like no guy will like me. I know first world problem right pshtt. Almost everyone around me seems to be in a relationship. Sometimes I feel little left out ya know. Although I know that my time will come and time will tell but I can't help but feel a little alone. I'd love to know what you think. I value your opinion very much. Thanks in advance Marissa! :) xx

    1. It's not weird or bad, honestly. Being single shouldn't be seen as a bad thing because you get to have so much time invested in yourself. In my humble opinion, it's better to let these things happen to you rather than forcefully make things happen because I've never really been into the dating scene, more of a relationship kind of girl. But if you're eager to yknow try it out, get yourself out there and socialize more. Meet friends of friends, get on Tinder and see what happens? Hahaha. I've never personally used it but my friends who do, seem to have fun using it to meet/talk to people. Go in with a "having fun" mentality first though, less pressure that way.

      I hope this helps and thank you so much for stiilll reading blog regardless of the lack of posts lately.
      Best of luck, don't be too bothered by it. Boy problems are the last thing you want, trust me hahah xx

  2. Hello Marissa! I heard you studied at Nottingham Malaysia and I'm thinking to go there but I'm scared. I know this is pretty random questions haha but is the campus ok? is there any racism?

    1. Hiii! Sorry for the super delayed reply. Personally, I really do like the campus. The facilities more than suffice and as far as racism goes, I have never experienced it/heard of any racist experiences on campus. The campus is really diverse and although not everyone mingles with everyone, it really isn't something you should be worried about coming here xx

  3. Dear M,

    Happy belated birthday. 21.

    I hope you'll find inspiration when it comes to writing. A motivation perhaps, in any way, any shape and/or any form. The way you pen your thoughts into sentences are one of the best ways you could liberate yourself from the "limbo" you are in and I am certain the majority of the writing community share this same notion. Write more, write often.

    The reading writers would miss you when you don't.

    But you are right, do not force it upon yourself to write. Words should flow like the river, smoothly through and guided by the riverbanks of your creativity instead of pressuring through a crack of a dam.

    Feel better soon. You will overcome it. With age comes experience. And if all that you do is observe these experiences and rationalise them, then you would be much wiser than you give yourself credit for.

    And if all else fail, hey, Inside Scoop has the best waffles and ice cream ;3

    Your Reader,

    P/S: If you have the chance, and feel like like adding to your melancholy playlist, try listening to Alice Kristiansen's Twilight Blue. And also Moon and Back.

    1. Hey A,

      Thanks for this, i needed it. I'm honestly trying my best to write but even words have failed me lately. I miss it so much but i think i owe it to myself to write even when i don't feel like it just to liberate myself of my thoughts.

      Thanks, A. Always good to hear from you xx